i was rollin on her like bob the builder
i wonder what megan fox's vagina feels like.
Heaven soaked bacon.
I'm getting the same feeling waiting for the web-page to load that has my final grades that I get when I take a pregnancy test. I think I'm gonna leave my computer for 3 minutes.
tolerance is too high. going on a liquor strike. ghandi style.
Did you spray paint that captain morgan fifth that's in the freezer gold?
I put bits of fruit cocktail in the jello shots i made because i knew that they were gonna be the only thing we ate all day
At a St Pats house party. Just raised $110 for two short chicks to crawl into a dog cage together. Video forthcoming. Respect.
level of my singleness - just ate a whole pizza topless in bed.
Is everything ok? Last time I missed your call you were being arrested.
so my pro life roomate found a used condom wrapped up in her sheets with your panties. never letting you have sex in her bed again
In Punta Cana for my bachelor trip, hopefully tomorrow my passport is blacklisted
Things he's good at: oral sex and geometry. Things he's not good at: actual sex.
I'm too high and old for this...
Is it sad the checkout lady had to inform my mom she can't buy alcohol before 8am?
Have u seen my vagina and my gorilla costume? Im in need of it.
Randomize