I just fell asleep with a sandwich in my mouth at Cosi..people definitely saw
Whats the glycemic index on semen?
I have a drunk 6th sense to lyrics of songs i dont know. It only works when i dance..
I wouldnt consider it a good Wednesday if there wasn't any projectile vomit involved
Thanks for talking me down from peeing on his window last night.
I am now curious as to how you would have aimed.
The forest. Magic mushrooms. Wind trees leaves sky. That is alll.
What can i say, i'm an artist. I think deep thoughts. In between the homoerotica and pterodactyl noises
My birthday is in 11 days. Going ham. Consciousness will not be an option
We were so drunk that when I broke the bottom off a pint glass we decided to make it into a candle holder. How does that happen?!
Can I just have sex with him and then never talk to him? I need him to be the Mr. Miyagi of my sex life.
I feel I must have sex with him first to fully decide where my vagina belongs.
I will never look at a penis the same again. After that I will appreciate them so much more than I do. Makes me wanna kiss yours just for being pretty
Just told myself the phrase "You're not THAT single" while dressing myself
He has great taste in girls. I feel closer to my Eskimo sisters than my real sister...
I just realized I had arrested my one night stand from last night...
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