Why is there a cactus in the microwave?
Don't worry about it.
just found preset five on the shower head...pretty sure my pussy just had a panic attack
Question: Would it be wrong to just fuck both of them and decide who to date one performance of their cocks?
she was sobbing drunk in the backseat about her dead cat and how the guy in the front seat didn't want to hook up with her
I dare you try and top an Eiffel tower full of Margarita
He is now the second fuck buddy that i have met by walking up and grinding on him. My ass is so much more productive than dating
Sorry I kept grabbing your vagina at the casino. I believed it was my lucky unicorn to win bonuses
Lucas & I had a photo shoot with her cape & I had child arm floaties on most the night.. woke up in a spiderman bed
Put it this way, at one point I was getting stoned on the roof of the strip club with one of the strippers while another one gave me a free lap dance. That wasn't even the best part of the night.
No I just rolled on the floor giggling. I think that's the equivalent to a post sex victory dance.
Just specific performance'd my way into her pants. I literally said specific performance and that shit worked. Thanks B. Law!
Would 7 layered rainbow jello shots entice you?
I mean like, I missed 30 minutes of star wars to fuck you on Christmas so you must be worth something
This town is a penis wasteland. I haven't seen a suitable penis in months. This is becoming an emergency situation. I need penis in my life
She's just a lonely cunt and i hope she stays that way for the rest of her fucking life.
This seems like an over reaction to someone eating your fries.
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