I will show your tits more attention than Michael Jackson's death.
Barsexuality is the new black.
It's American, baby! There ain't nothin gross about America.
do you know how scary it is to wake up in a CATSCAN machine after a night of drinking?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you fucked my boyfriend. margarita girls night will not fix this.
I'm just saying, margarita tuesday would turn anyone gay.
He made a fake guest pass that was just a note card with "I'm here. Me." written in sharpie, and tried to convince the security guard it was real.
His penis smells like laundry I just wanted to cuddle it
This Halloween will be different. I'm just here to get shitfaced, not troll around looking for slutty nun pussy.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Thanks for taking care of me. I hope I didn't pee in your car.
Question: what's the protocol for seeing your mistress walking alongside her clueless boyfriend? If you could answer this ten minutes ago, that'd be great.
It is a bad day indeed when you learn that your boy toy looks better in your dresses than you do
You danced?!
I just jiggle to the beat like a sexy lava lamp
im in DESPERATE NEED OF A COMPANION RIGHT NOW I’M MOTHER FUCKING TRIPPING SOLID GOLD BALLS
So, random question. How much should you tip a Lyft driver when you realized you've fucked his sister? Asking for a friend.
Randomize