help help how do i get him away from me should i talk in a robot voice or something
I managed to throw up 90 feet under water, just removed my breathing tube, puked, put it back in. All inclusive is the way to go.
He woke me up at 4am just to lick my nipple. Then he talked in his sleep for 20 minutes about the sex we just had. I think it's safe to say he's a weird one, but I dont care cuz he fucks like a champ.
Okay. Did anyone see me spend $1600 at the strip club last night? Or is this someone else's receipt in my pocket?
I hope he says my name when they're having anniversary sex this weekend.
so exactly what is concert sex etiquette? Before, during or after???
all of the above
I think I am calling out of work due to a hangover. I'm 96% sure there ISN'T tampon stuck inside me.
If you two are having sex, stop. I have something really important to ask you about psychics.
Pretty sure I picked a cat up off the street and took him home with me, fed him tuna, then let him go
You're lucky you got out when you did, about an hour later the girl in the Franzia box started wrestling everyone.
Like my new perfume? It's a combination of Fireball, sex and bad decisions.
I walked a mile in this weather wearing nothing but a toga. Zero fucks. Your move Mother Nature.
Let us rub each other in fish scales and become mermaids
I can't go to Fassler and not immediately think about you licking a guys wife's butthole in the family restroom
Is it weird that I shop for lingerie by thinking if it will look good on both me and your floor?
No. Not at all.
Randomize
