Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
So..he puked on my dress and I had to walk back to the dorms in his little sisters Scooby Doo pajamas.
I don't know you.
happiness is walking an amphibious rodent on a leash
i was blowing him and "what if god was one of us" came on his playlist. I had to leave
you passed out when you kept trying to hold your breath during the underwater scenes of 2012
When you gave me the first bj i thought 'yep, this girl is going to do great things with her life'
Sorry i'm not sorry i made out with your dad. It was father's day weekend, get a grip
It never fails.. every time I have a dick in my mouth he calls me.
He bought me shots at the bar as his way of of paying me back for Plan B
you know u lost to a carboard cut out of sammy sosa in beer pong last night.
So i am officially handcuffed to the pole on the party bus while taking jello shots.....this shall be an interesting night
yeah she's crazy. she fought a possum in my alley because it was "being a cagey little cunt"
I just found your ripped underwear on my chandelier. Care to explain?
Your english degree would kill itself if it could read that text.
maybe a couloe typos.. noooooooooo big deal
This Asian instant coffee I found in ur kitchen is like crack. Who knew I could feel my heart beating in my asshole after one cup of this happiness.
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