I'm really into asian looking animals
He's been dancing to the same Rob Thomas album in his room for almost 8 hours now. Please never, ever bring extacy over here again.
He asked me If i had cheated on my boyfriend when I said no he said it's like he doesnt know me anymore
I looked at you and you stared at me dead in the eyes then sprayed febreze at your crotch and winked.
Pretty sure I blacked out the last 48 hours, the last thing I remember is the 4 pm bar crawl on Thurs
Can you believe they're going to let me be a doctor?
When else am I ever going to have a chance to do lines with T-Pain?
If you ever bitch out on 72oz margarita night again, this friendship is over
When you guys came back from the bar, I thought everyone was a T-Rex - Thats why i was hiding under the table. Never doing shrooms with Drunk people again
I just found out via Facebook that my old dorm room is now the free condom distribution room on campus...IT'S LIKE THE UNIVERSE KNOWS!
Does Jim keep sending you pics of him in drag too???? If so, are you also slightly uncomfortable?
I had to run home with my hands covering my tits this morning. How does this keep happening?
I'll get you through man, I'll be your fairy godmother with better prescription drugs
Thus began an intricate shell game of nude cardigan photos
He showed up soaking wet with a flashlight and a ping pong ball. I couldn't say no
Well we've always known you have a weakness for guys with balls in their hands
We're about to get drunk and it feels wrong without you
Randomize
