He was eating her out on the elevator. What a good man.
Eventually the creepy theater major quirks will come out. Probably in bed. Like role playing as the Phantom of the Opera
Today my mom told me "that's what worries me about you getting blacked out drunk... You don't look pretty"
he's drinking beer at home in his underwear tonight and if you want to come over the dresscode is underwear only. And you have to bring beer.
Fair warning: We've transformed the living room into a giant tent.
You won’t make it to November. A 21st bday and Halloween in the same night has shitshow/ jail written all over it. So I call dibs on that tall guy
Would be fun, plus since its in public I'll keep my penis in my pants
I have major gossip for you.
Oh no, did you have sex last night?
If I had sex last night I'd probably post it on facebook. It's been that long and I'd be that excited.
I am the girl who goes to bed with her make-up on so that she doesn't have to fully redo it in the morning. I am obviously not ready to be a mother.
How does that even work?
Awareness is good for change and all, but ignorance is bliss. I like bliss.
I'm going to start charging you rent if you keep leaving your random conquests on my living room couch the morning after
is it acceptable to cross the border for sex?
So i stood up out of the sunroof while he gave me oral. Car was still moving. Exactly how illegal is that?
Honestly cannot tell if I’m magical or really, really high.
All I know is when I asked you how many fingers I was holding up, you said "Hippo"
Randomize
