so wait, they're fucking, but it doesn't count as cheating cause they only do anal?
have u ever looked at the reflection of the water n watched the poop come out of u?
why can't you just be normal
you sang the finger bang song from south park while fingering me. needless to say, kind of a turn off.
"Don't get as drunk as I was on my birthday" has been upgraded from a goal for Friday night to a goal for my life in general.
Stripper pole. Sore legs. More vaca money.
Clearly my hormones are sending beaming lights to every penis in the area
She asked if I wanted to "Mormon Motorboat" her, which I guess is just motor-boating her through her cloths. Turns out I did.
It was kicking off big time until you crawled out the bar on your hands and knees. Nobody wanted to mess with that.
He was "hot guy in the dark". One of us had to sleep with him. I took the bullet you're welcome.
She makes margaritas with lemon-lime 5 hour energy..thats brilliant
and you were wondering how she got into Harvard
He's actually really cute and seems like a good guy. And given that he likes lots of drugs, he could come in handy.
I walked in to you guys using a milk jug as a gravity bong
Surrounded by smaller versions of the same
I realized just how much my daughter is MINE when I heard her tell someone "Go shit yourself" yesterday.
So my furniture is upside-down, two lamps are glued to the ceiling, and there is a kitten sleeping on Kyle's face. Please tell me what happened last night....
I just got out of a $280 speeding ticket by acting like The Big Lebowski. Seriously Jeff Bridges is the man.
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