broke, out of weed, out of gas, out of food, and my gf just left me.
you're writing country songs now?
He booked his flight from Dallas already, no ticket to the game, said hes gonna bang some girl at tailgait to get a ticket, I had to explain that it will be sub 20 degrees F during tailgate, he decided to come in july instead, Texans are dumb.
I have the Lakers game on, but all I can think about is having sex with you. Not sure what you've done here.
peeing on that welcome mat was like, the highlight of my week
Just bought a 17 year old 40's while wearing a poncho. This behavior is acceptable until I'm 25.
let's see, i ended up walking for an hour towards a macdonalds that didnt exist, sprinted full tilt into a powerline, and left a 30 dollar tip to a waitress at dennys we made friends with. I REGRET NOTHING
I don't hate him I just hate being present to see him consume 80 dollars worth of alcohol and then try to tip people with left over money on a Walmart gift card
Here's what I don't understand. How does anyone watch you eat mayo for 12 minutes and then ever fuck you again??
Apparently 24 hr fitness frowns upon the ingestion of psychedelics on its premises, don't see that in the sign up contract.
Trying to figure out why my back is hurting. And then I remember I got fucked up against a tree last night
I fucking hate humanity. I met a twenty three year old adult with an aol email account today. I'm not sure how those things are related, but I'm sure they are.
In my defense I didn't know there was concrete on the other side of that fence when I tossed him over it.
You're both fucking idiots and this is why I should never let you two drink alone.
mate iv just woke up in the garden. either help me inside or bring out my vodka
He kept spinning my wedding ring like thanks buddy I remember
She deleted me on Facebook. I think it's safe to say that she knows I fucked him now.
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