I guess there's a 50 percent chance that it was her that wet my bed.
I came back to the apartment and he was waiting for me, covered in mustard.
needless to say I left
you kept lifting my skirt up, yelling "PANTY PARTY". needless to say, you're at the top of my father's shit list right now.
I just randomly started counting the number of guys that I've hooked up with that are now gay. 11.
What's the kids name that was drinking stale beer and redbull out of the blender?
I just need to actually convince myself that drunkenly having sex won't help me forget the last time I drunkenly had sex, it only makes the situation worse.
You passed out in my bathroom last night. I put a towel over your face so I could shit without it being gay
seeing two hook-ups in tagged in the same picture will send chills down anyone's spine.
And then we made hashbrowns with vodka and queso.
I'm pretty sure I just discovered what the American Dream is said the person eating a hotdog for breakfast in bed in her underwear
That man gives me hope. I can't help it. And by "hope" I mean "wood."
Cant get off the floor. Need more beer. Send help.
I can say with absolute certainty the only time we ever had a civil conversation was when we agreed we both liked pizza.
Its official, kitchen-couch is my favorite.
You passed out again didn't you?
its likely that this occurred.
I just found my phone after looking for it since yesterday afternoon it was in the fridge.
Randomize
