Don't you think facebook is a bit pretentious, suggesting friends and all? No facebook, I would NOT like to be friends with a girl whose fiancee I have slept with.
im officially scared..,i finally realized who my boyfriend reminds me of! spencer pratt
Do the low cut shirt test. If he stares at your tits even in front of your brother, he's down.
You know you're a nerd when you lose track of how many times you've gotten turned on watching Glee.
He told me he wouldn't do any drunk sluts but me. I guess that's sort of a compliment...?
On my way home right now. I miss you. let's cuddle. whiskey.
congratulations to me i think I am on the road to legitimate alcoholism
cool. same. I'm in class drinking
NOT OKAY
sorry for partying
THATS NOT PARTYING THATS DRINKING IN CLASS
No just sleep deprived. James woke me up at 7 and forced me to eat a hot pocket with him cause he " didn't want me to die".
I taped a pair of scissors and a coupon for a waxing on the door. He gets to choose.
I'm crying at a bar by myself drinking a pear martini drawing things dicks are scared of. How was your day?
Oddly enough, the sex change dream i had made me miss you more.
I've decided that buying my first unused mattress has been my first major step into real adulthood.
My tinder date had to be home by 8:30 cause she's on house arrest.
UPS just delivered me 30lbs of dried cherries... I shouldn't be allowed online when I take painkillers.
If I look at him, he starts sobbing. Please come get him; he's scaring the cats.
Randomize
