oh my god im such an asshole. i just asked the guitarist of bad religion if he was a scalper.
Well i threw up in my mouth a few times. But i successfully swallowed it. Still going strong.
Wow, t9 really hates the phrase "slap her in her sanctimonious pie-hole."
"Party in the USA" was played at church youth group last night. It was like everything I enjoy hating was aligning against me.
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Gentleman, we have a new medal category - number of women per day in apartment WITHOUT FURNITURE
Where are you and who are these girls passed out on the floor?
and why are they spooning a flamingo?
they traded weed for a spot on our floor. be nice.
I'm really not interested in hearing from him. Unless there is casual sex involved
There's a questionable stain on Harley's bed...would they have sex on a dog bed?
He called it restless penis syndrome. I call it cheating.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Serious question: Should I volunteer to get tazered? My instincts say no but my wild side says yes.
Dude, you went to another fraternity's formal as a joke and came home with one of their dates. AND you managed to get her number. Please explain to me how that's not a good night.
I don't know how Dave is alive, I feel like he's been drinking since I met him.
I went to BBQ fest on Wednesday and came home wearing a different shirt, so I think I did some good damage.
You want further proof that God hates me? Okay. We're on the way to the ER. A homeless man stabbed me at the gas station.
WHY are you masturbating to hockey fights?
Randomize