I tried booty calling last night but apparently he was too tired and wants to meet up tonight. I told him planning defeats the purpose.
this morning i woke up with my panties on and i knew where i was. success.
Spider just rapelled from her vag rethinking online dating.
Sorry about your blender, your tiolet, your weed, and your dog...
I'm eager to hear this explaination.
oh yea it is. i was not expecting to look at a snowbank and just see flying mushrooms
I'm this close to masturbating to his profile pics from 2006
Ugh. my cast still smells like fermenting hot tub water and bad decisions.
I'm sorry that I ate boneless ribs off of your sister, but that is no reason to drink my alcohol.
Dude I've kinda accepted I may leave Nola with the clap.
She made out with the kickboxers bf. She was just asking to get kicked in the head. In the middle of the bar.
The worst part about getting "creative" and by that i mean baked is that i just wanna get laid right now and all im doing is eating nachos
You do realize how pathetic it is when the woman who does your bikini waxes has seen your vagina more than I have
I've gotten 2 singers numbers, a 6'5 dude has promised to take me to Oktoberfest, and I spent the night w a pilot named Zeus who looks like caramel tastes. Also I sprained my thumb punching some guy I named 'hater'. I love Nashville
SOS YOU NEED TO TAKE THE CANDY PANTIES OUT OF THE GLOVE COMPARTMENT BEFORE MOM TAKES MY CAR
just turned another straight guy gay. Goddamn the church must hate me
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