Dude, I'm in her bathroom and there's crab shampoo... is it worth the risk?
You're missing what this discovery implies... she's got a fucking bush.
I wish there were wingman of the year awards.
I have got to stop assigning last names to girls I get numbers from based on what I think will remind me of them... Sarah Petrydish is not an acceptable memory trigger
He fell off a seesaw, tore half his ear off and somehow convinced the paramedic he was allowed to have a beer while being treated
you pulled down your pants to convince a girl you were god
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
But apparently I got kicked in the head by a stripper at some point
Can I just have sex with him and then never talk to him? I need him to be the Mr. Miyagi of my sex life.
I hope one day I make out with someone in a taco truck :(
I'm glad I inspire you to reach for the stars
Or a taco
When have we listened to the rational side of either of us?!
I pulled a muscle last night drunk dirty snapchatting him
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Idk she didn't seem that weird to me but I had just eaten an entire tray of jello infused with liquor so I could be wrong...
I wanna say I regret bonging a beer while having sex with Mike, but it helped me get thru it.
I'm over here willing to be the Yoda of fucking but I guess he just doesn't want to be a Jedi.
Can you face time me. I need to know if this pill is xanex or ecstasy
Juice tastes so weird without alcohol
couldn't remember his name. introduced him as 'mr multiple orgasms'
Randomize