And God said, "Let there be Twilight," and it was so.
I should injure you considerably.
we just got in the car and birthday sex is playing
that is a sign the 3 of us should have a threesome
we agree. completely
wrong asian. never thought that would happen.
Midgets have it so easy. They have so much less leg area to shave.
Somewhere in this world my second husband is in 9th grade.
just friend requested my arresting officer from last night. too soon??
after eating me out, he asked for something to drink. i gave him a glass of water and he said he needed something stronger.
He said female orgasms are a myth and refuses to even try to give me one.
I also turned off the Anchorman DVD start menu before cause I didn't want Will Ferrel watching me lose my virginity.
Star Trek does not adequately answer all the questions that I have about alien genitals
I bet Billy Ray Cyrus wishes he had pulled out now....
The picture on Facebook I was just tagged in, with the mask, that is the definition of Carmen, my drunk alter ego
I did coke with the Royal Navy last night. God save the queen.
Chasing shots with airborne.. Gonna get rid of my sickness and my soberness.
Apologies that our conversations always turn to butt sex or penis size. I thought we out grew that in our 20's.
Randomize
