I woke up to him trying to put his dick in my mouth. When I asked him what he was doing he said he was trying to make me stop snoring...
He screamed "Oh boy! Oh boy!" during climax.
my step dad just called me a drunken slut..someone in my family finally understands me
I'd invite him but there's too many people who have fucked me going already
She just sent me videos of her blowing my little bro and my best friend... worst. ex. ever.
he passed out at 11 at a party. he deserved to be stripped down an duct taped to the floor
he was like the dessert in the all you can eat man buffet that has become my life.
Is it too forward to say "stop being a good friend and start being a good fuck buddy"
That makes 14 Xmas cards already! Middle aged people are really nice to their dealers.
Sex with you deserves a trophy and a day of remembrance in honor of it.
So this is what it's like to wake up with someone else's blood in your nose...
Then while I was crying on his shoulder, he got a boner. Soo. I kinda just hopped on.
Double check your contract and see if it says anything about sleeping with your manager
Thank you, BTW, for defiling my bed. Glad it was done well.
Honestly cannot tell if I’m magical or really, really high.
Randomize
