My wife all of the sudden got markedly better at giving blow jobs. Should I be happy or concerned?
Just found a glow stick inside of my vagina..
With the amount of traffic your vagina gets, it was only a matter of time before someone threw a rave there.
how do you wash the taste of whore out of your mouth?
ii just google-imaged 'sad turtle' and maggie gyllenhaal only came up once. what is the world coming to?
jersey shore has given me a vivid depiction of what things will be like for me once i get to hell
Remember that foreign guy who never talked last night? He just came out of my bathroom when I woke up.
Whatever dude, I don't feel bad about it. If my girlfriend finds out even SHE should give me a high five. That bitch was fine
HE'S turngign 18teen real soon.k
He doesn't care. He wouldn't care if my vag grew arms and smacked him in the face.
Operation: pick up a lawyer was a resounding success. Commence operation: football mugshot weekend
It's all a blur. I just remember holding some strangers baby
Yah. Thai people are way too trusting
reason #1 why i should never live alone: i haven't put pants on since she left 26 hours ago. and ive made spaghetti 3 times.
yeah I had to wear a fucking diaper from work home so I didn't get the shitty squirts all over my cars seats it was fucked
You know it was a good night when you wake up w/o a shirt in someone elses living room next to a pancake on a spoon in a bowl of spaghetti.
I ended up sleeping with him in a public bathroom because neither of us remembered where we lived. I have hit a new low.
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