we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
i'm chasing tequila w mint flavored ice cream, phil's chasing it w cream cheese, bashar's chasing it w pickles...i think we all know who the winner is....
Waitress cut us off at Chili's bar. New low
$3 wine plus diet sprite does not make good champagne.
does taste better than andre tho
After we had sex he bought me grape soda. I think I'll keep him.
We'll probably be arrested for having a cheetah in our apartment anyway, so I say go for it.
He sang nursery rhymes to my vagina to get me to have sex with him..
she was masturbating to a video of herself masturbaing. She's a keeper
Have you fucked anyone in the hospital yet because obviously this illness isnt worth it unless you do. I MISS YOUR HEALTH
I'm dealing with this like an adult, cupcakes and beer.
I knew when her mom came in spraying me with Febreeze telling me I smelled like shame it was going to be a rough day.
My goal for the weekend: procure a blowjob using only stern glances, hand gestures, and crudely-drawn stick figures.
I just had sex with the Sheriff's Deputy. You should call me.
I might be drinking a 4-day old opened beer on a Wednesday. You're in no position to judge me.
It would have only made it one day at my place.
all I want for my birthday is booze and sex toys. don't bother calling if neither of those are included.
Randomize
