Just walk through the Honors dorm on a Saturday night. You'll feel better about yourself.
How do u explain cocaine to a 9 year old?
some random kid just walked into our apartment with two cases... I don't know who he is but I like him
i just packed a bowl on a big bird place mat and smoked it in a spaceship with a slide. i love babysitting.
Im about to have a threesome, Ill pay you twenty bucks to go clean my room. Just throw it all in the closet.
He tried to bang a 300 pounder last night. No joke. I shotgunned a tall boy in a bar cuz the bartender didn't crack the beer. Cant wait till Nashville.
He drunkenly stumbled over to me and told me my "crotch looks spectacular tonight"..... i think this could work
I don't think I will ever be as happy about anything as this man next to me on the bus eating Taco Bell.
He's thawing a cheesecake on his stomach. We're that high.
Drinking hard cider in a room full of freshman girls. Never felt so secure of my manhood
I probably wouldn't
They are like untrained puppies reaking havoc on a newly furnished house. Out of control.
You just compared our vaginas to a newly furnished house...I can dig it.
And thank god for autocorrect cuz I can't even think in English let alone spell in it right now.
well you're talking to a woman who had glorious sex less than 24 hrs ago so my opinion is biased.
She's wear your skin crazy! Is it wrong that I'm gonna fuck her 1 more time though?
Ha. Yeah that's all I found you with this morning. Butt ass naked w my robe across your lap and your arms thrown back in handcuff position.
Randomize
