When the moon hits your eye like a big pizza pie, you're a dumbass
I just encouraged Kelsey to make out with some guy for beer so I could take one, does this make me a pimp?
By definition I think it does.
So this is what it feels like to be all that is man.
i just threw up repeatedly on the entire entire walk down A1A to the pizza place....then on the way back slipped and fell in it
he ate 15 dinner rolls and nothing else. then took a shit in the bathroom came out and blamed it on his dad. i wish i was 8.
honestly I asked the same thing when we had our slip n slide and margarita party
Whoever brought the pigeon, please come and remove it from my living room.
He called me at two in the morning to tell me he was throwing the tiny Thor hammer at moving vehicles. Apparently he missed the guy on the motorcycle.
Maybe is for pussies. We only say yes in this household
I like that our conversation ended with "im gonna go get pregnant goodnight"
Why can't burritos get me drunk
We just had sex in the shed while having a conversation about cheeseburgers...so that's how my day is going
he made that chewbacca noise when he came. like father like son i guess.
Recliner chair sex has moments of worry....just don't.
Why didn't we pregame for this?
Because it's breakfast!?!
How's the party?
I'm watching two people get flogged. Sothere's that.
Randomize
