break up sex still means we will always be broken up.
I'm scared
There's nothing to be scared of. My penis is average size.
That's what I'm afraid of
I feel like tequila is Gods way of lighting my fuse to do something awesome
It's cute how he thinks we're going to have sex again
Saw the college gyno today. It has now been medically confirmed that I have a perfect vagina.
And I'm not sure if that's how you pluralize penis. Never planned on needing to know that in my life.
Congrats. You are not detrimental enough to my psyche to be discussed during this mornings therapy appointment. Please follow up next week to see if you made the cut.
Gas station champagne. And before you say anything I'll have you know it's imported. From California. So get fucked.
just like fucking own it. stare that cop in the eye and just keep masturbating "yeah motherfucker Im high as shit and this feels great"
LMAO I like how "don't worry I'll bring chasers" is your way of assuring things will be ok
We got really high and he took a green marker and made my vagina into a Christmas tree.
Eh, I don't question what my penis likes. It just does what it does.
I came over to get dick...not to watch you vacuum....at 2 AM
sarahs drunk and is drawing dinosaurs all over the apartment. should i stop her?
whats she drawing them with?
eyeliner
no that's ok
I guess when the asshole said “I really miss you and want to get back together” he actually meant “I’m banging a Hooters girl behind your back.”
I hope she gives him gonorhea
Randomize
