I will die if light touches me.
girls mom is dying from cancer and she msgs me for a booty call. I guess people cope with their situations differently.
Definitely saw about 20 people at my final that were never present before. It's like seeing who's gonna be serving me fries in 4 years.
Ive been tazing him too get him immuned. He will be unstopable.
They don't allow McDonald's in the ER. Go figure
I woke up next to him fully clothed but my thong was around his neck. Polling to decide if we had sex or not starts now.
It'd be a romantic, consensual abduction
Fuck I keep finding new battle scars from our fight. Justin told me I stabbed you with a broom handle.. Do you remember ripping my pants off?
I just hope when I turn 21, it doesn't tank my entire semester.
You were so stoked after landing that flip that you dropped acid with three random guys without hesitation
Happy birthday and sorry I punched your friend in the face
I'm tryna think of an appropriate time to say "when I suck other dicks they seem like training dicks compared to yours" but I really can't think of a good way to say that
new low: I blocked him from seeing my snapchat story in hopes he will text me because he'll be afraid I'm dead or something
HOW THE FUCK IS IT POSSIBLE THAT THE JUNIOR HIGH STUDENT IS BETTER AT BEING AN ADULT THAN I AM!?!?
he was wearing a pyjama shirt under a dress shirt under a hoodie under a robe under a rain poncho the man was prepared for anything
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