I hate thxgiving break now because that totally means I'm not able to have sex for a week.
New Jersey isn't a real state, it's just a myth you tell little kids to scare them like Canada or Carrot Top
The freshman came home at 9 this morning with one heel, no pants, and a strangers sweatshirt covered in tequila-scented vomit. I think we're done corrupting her for a while.
Even though he is humpbacked he is really good in bed.
do you know how hard it is to pee with a pumpkin in the toilet ?
she's doing key bumps of parmesean cheese
I got pulled into the conversation by "she sleeps with everybody" then "she" involved sleeping with "cocks the size of a viva burrito"
you took a picture of the hospital bathroom and sent it to me
I will keep you posted and someday if we daydrink teach you how to do a footjob
Body shots with my MILFs MILF!!
All I did was send my mom an ecard
I fucked him while wearing his hat. I love the navy
at one point while they were drilling into my jaw I just remember thinking "will I ever be able to suck dick again"
Only I could turn my one night stands into class essays. Go me.
I know you would. And one day, we'll have a moment where i'll verbally assault a stranger for you.
He’s going to a lawnmower race. I got a Brazilian and he’s racing a lawnmower race. Pick me up. I’m not wasting this waxing on John Deer
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