Did you hallucinate the same white buffalo that I did last night.
No, but I did see you shaking hands with a homeless man.
I just peed or puked all or around my parjibgb lot.
parking. I am not drunk
either we just had an earthquake or I am really good @ masturbating
i broke up with my boyfriend last night because i had to eat a freezy pop in every color and he ate the last blue one. i sat on the floor and cried for an hour at least. everyone left. so i decided that this whole weed thing isnt really healthy for my relationships.
does drinking everclear count as brushing your teeth? because i think they are sterilized
No, no, no. Fuck you. I took a glass blowing class solely to learn how to make that bong. You shattered it and my dreams in a matter of five seconds.
we're using his nephews tonka truck toy as a cooler for the beer
Sat down on an escalator. That hungover.
Spring Fling is on 420. The theme better be 'Flower Child'.
I want there to be fog machines and unicorns.
I feel like on the last day of finals we should run around campus dressed like Moses screaming "LET MY PEOPLE GO!!!!"
I'll start the recruiting
why am i naked
you took off your clothes at the party and some guy took them home
I think weed is turning my hair brown
HE LITERALLY JUST PEED IN MY ROOM IDK WHAT TO DO HELP
I was having a dream that I was swimming in a pool filled with melted chocolate but woke up to find I had poured chocolate milk all over my body
I'm in the upstairs bathroom. I went to the bathroom after class and realized this is not a shit I want to have publicly. I ran home. We can go to lunch, just give me a min
Randomize
