i just had sex bonerless
What did you want me to do? You know I don't like fat people. I'm an asshole to them sober it only gets worse when I'm drunk
That doesn't make it okay! You tried kicking the girl's mom out where we were having the party at!
Ok a condom literally fell out of my underwear this morning, i have never been so confused.
I did my dad and i had to keep going back there to pick up coffee
please read the first 4 words of that text and consider punctuation
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No, he grudge fucked my ex so I wouldn't be tempted to get back with her. He is either the worst or best friend ever.
She checked into foursquare right as she left work so he would think she was there late and not on some other guy's dick
I have to say for barely passing high school, that girl is a genius.
In retrospect pumpkin carving while drinking Patron was a bad idea.
My building was evacuated who wants to quake and bake
I made out with all three roommates...I didnt realize that was actually an awkward situation.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There's nothing worse than carrying your fairy crown and wings home wearing fishnets
And to add, there was a fat guy right next to me who, when the girls would shake their butts, he would let out a shrill xena warrior princess cheer
I need to find another hobby that doesn't include being hungover.
some dude just accurately guessed my height and bra size.. that is cup AND inches around. creepy, yet impressive
He made the moves first, we made out...then we folded his laundry.
We will discuss everything tomorrow i presume. Including the sweaty naked tango.
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