I'm pretty sure that he just gave me the ginger disease
She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
just came on the shower curtain. sorry housekeeping.
sounds like you fell off the wagon.
fuck falling off. at this point, the wagon is a dot on the horizon.
She told me I reminded her of the fair. And she wanted to deep fry my dick and eat it.
It'll just be like "PENIS HERE". In case you get lost.
I keep jumping up and down in front of the mirror naked. The only motivation I would be to stop and put clothes on is if you come over. Hurry.
She just told me she thinks she bruised her labia in class
Relaxed was like phase 1 of this phase 7 high
Is the Chairman of the College Republicans throwing upon your toilet right now? 'Murica!
Just licked cheese from my hot pocket off my phone. I spilled because I was eating a Popsicle at the same time. Send an adult please
I explained to him that me turning straight is a once a year thing. And this boy just happens to be the chosen one.
I just ate the lyft drivers bacon cheeseburger. Well fuck me this night escalated quickly.
I just chased my birth control with Smirnoff. Shit's about to go down.
Just woke up beside some twink in a kilt.. how is your sunday going
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