Just had sex in the basement of the library... I knew I was paying $120,000 for something more than a law degree
This is a mass text: my birthday is tomorrow, and I want a full day of birthday sex. Send me your availabities. Time slots begin at noon
These hangoverless Sunday mornings are becoming too regular.
This exeeds the amount of high I planned on being.
we are torturing ourselves with these mediocre cocks
I always have trouble explaining my life decisions to people over the age of 30.
I'm by the dj to the left. Come get me now this girl is talking about baby names and I dnt even no hers
I can't see you
I'm the only one that's wearing a tarzan outfit get your ass over here you douche
I'm the fucking queen of sexting. I just made a blowjob sound so poetic I'm wishing I were a guy just so I could blow me. Learn from me.
Just wanted you to know two things, 1st I sent the second thing to a broad ive been talking too. 2nd that was not just a fart.
as much bud light as i have consumed over the years budweiser should give me a clydesdale
Dude, he wouldn't have sex with me during halftime cause we were rooting for different teams and that would be "bad juju", I had to settle for 69.
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
You texted him 17 times. Asking for him back and sending random pictures of Jimmy Buffett. He didn't answer.
let me assure you that a rugburn on your forehead is the worst side effect of tequila i have experienced to date.
Every dick I’ve had or wanted in the last year is married. It’s like I became a professional home wrecker after I graduated.
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