had no condoms so I just made do with an empty doritos bag.
Laziness has reached now heights if you too unmotivated to buy pot
when your hometown is famous for abortion clinic bombings, hurricanes, and jude law's newest bastard, its probably time to move.
I'm buying a chandelier at walmart. WHO'S CLASSY NOW, BITCHES.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
: am i supposed to send the mass text 'merry christmas!' to my booty calls too?
The liquor store was handing out free shots of some new expensive vodka, but they caught on the fourth time we came back in different outfits. Politics.
Aaaand my life has been reduced to whether I can reach to flush my puke down the toilet using my foot. The answer is yes.
I NEVER left your party last night of anyone asks.
Yeah, I didn't wake up handcuffed to my bed either.
If you get me so fucked up I can't use the microwave , I'm going to be so mad at you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I asked you if you needed a ride and you kept saying "no, my name is katelyn"
New brilliant plan: invite two random okcupid girls to the same bar at the same time, have them compete
I'm making poor life decisions again. Tune in tomorrow to see how much I hate life.
Dude, you stalking his LINKEDIN profile will NOT affect your chances with him. We aren't 40...
I just wanna have sex and go to Denny's after is that too much to ask for.
UHG. i just want to have hot lesbian sex and eat pizza with you.
Randomize