i was unaware that anal sex sometimes ends with shit on the bed.
Is it really that bad? I heard it was like pooping. I like pooping.
He's the biggest piece of shit to ever exist. He's not even wearing shoes.
Oh no, it isn't official until she poops.
I may be a little fuzzy on this, but I think at some point I said something about being a generous lover.
I THINK I JUST JOINED A GANG. PLEASE PICK ME UP.
Dude you went around coming up behind people and whispering in their ears. I dont know what you said but they looked terrified when you left.
I slept with him that night and I'm not sure if my lack of enthusiasm was obvious but I found him eating ice cream in the bathtub the next morning. Mom will be so proud.
He wheeled me around walmart in a cart, and stole at least 30 dollars of junior mints fpr me. Best date ever.
Lead with your genitals is the best advice I can give you.
I found my spirit animal in the shower. It's a sloth/bear that lives in my chest.
Watching boy meets world, drinking left over pink panty droppers and coloring in a my little pony coloring book. This is my Monday night
His crazy is a thing to be cherished
You're not talking any sense into me. You're cheering me on to disaster.
... is that not half the reason I'm your best friend in the first place?
I feel like a grown up and it scares me so I'm hiding out in the bathroom stall and messaging you
Randomize
