How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
he calls his bong barack obonga, commander in kief. i found where i belong.
who knew that a girl that let me piss on her within 20 minutes of meeting her would get upset i couldn't remember her name.
I love watching the kids I sold drugs to score touchdowns
i was driving around baked, windows down jamming to third eye blind and eating grapes for 35 minutes before i remembered why i left my house
At some point we were all eating banana flavored rolling papers.
Just walked into the bar to find a guy in a Boba Fett helmet leaning casually against the wall, texting. This night just got real.
He paid the bartender with money from the tip jar then proceeded to hit on me in front of my date. I love frat dances
I had a face to face conversation with her vagina, asking it not to make me look bad.
A beef tasting is not what I needed while hungover
Preparing for the bar exam has made my whatever disorder you said I have act up again
Whats proper etiquette for apologizing to your wife for being so drunk you stood up and pissed on the bedroom floor next to the bed?
I'm at the point in my life where I'm gonna sell my eggs for cash
Yeah just had sex and grub hub came right after he did. I’d say it’s a win.
Where you been?
Please tell me this is a booty call
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