I was about to buy asher roth's album and then i realized he was a ginger. can't support
Right now im sitting at home and all i can think about is im eating calories and i should be out drinking them.
If i evwr doyble fist jack daniels and smirnoff again, i hereby give you permission to take them both away grom me and give me and give me a glass of wat
This guys mom bought us a 24 pack and drove me and 8 others to a frat house... Hello moms weekend.
You were fucked up like a footballbat trying to eat gum off your shoe. And that wasn't even the nights lowest point.
Nothing says walk of shame like leather pants in daylight
Instead of getting a taxi some gay black guy drove us home. He is trying to break into the taxi business
Way to promote small business.
I swear to all that is holy, next time you get my mom high with your "special bake sale" I am going to put your dick in the blender.
We need to get fucked up again and play games like "save the tequila but dodge the knife"
Weird, Jen didn't know mixers were solely for coloring purposes. Don't call me an alcoholic because you're uneducated
I just felt emotion and I'm not okay with it
Found sauce from last night's pizza rolls wedged under my phone case... While sitting in my 8 am class. What happened last night?
Do you know how fucking great a bath bomb is when you're high?
Well that's disappointing. I guess I'll give a lesson on dick-breaking another time then
I got horny for like a second but the eggplant snapped me out of it
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