1. Mark my dj buddy and I spent $1000 on bottles last night
2. We were casually offered narcotics while walking down the street
3. I will still be awake when you start school tmw, cause there's no last call
So if any tells you miami is the same as the rest of america, there are just lying to you
he's a bartender at a gay strip club. maybe he can work his magic. with getting u in, not gay magic.
We started playin just the tip, then shit got crazy
she screamed "my eye!" and it brought me a surge of bad memories. except she was yelling about a lemon.
Still in Rome. Hooked up with frat boy from SoCal that's studying abroad. He said he was 1/8 italian. I'll take it.
I don't care how old I am, if it's your 21st birthday I'm going to make out with you.
Girl walking by was talking on the phone about how he needed to write a gratitude list in her letter to god this week. Too stoned
broke the door off of my fridge tryin to have a indoor rodeo
I learned so much about myself in that shower.
Jasmine is diving into bushes again.
I need a costume for that party. Even if I'm just taking it off.
Basically one minute I'm sucking on her nipples and then 45 mins later we're at work and she's my boss.
To be clear you just said "I'll give you a baby" as a sext?
Also I will be receiving my own bra in the mail because I left it at his place, woops
I guess you could say the date didn’t go so well since I was drunkenly Snapchatting with my ex by the end of it.
Randomize