so i just drove past a racoon and a kid on a long board... god i love 4am white castle runs
who the fuck is that kid sitting with you...
I don't have any fucking idea. I woke up and he was there. I'm kinda creeped out.
just puked in a purse in the store. some girl asked if i was gonna buy it now and i laughed and asked her why id want a bag some dude just puked in. her face looked like she saw the devil.
nothing like celebrating the fact that you're not a father by trying to impregnate other women
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yes, that's a picture of my balls. It isn't however an answer to my question.
found a ham sandwich in the elevator it tasted so hungry and it was still fresh. dont be mad at me. you know you love ham.
Have you asked your drug dealer if he wants to see harry potter with you?
Do you ever feel like a plastic bag?!
Shes 18 and still has a curfew. it was great. didnt have to worry about her still being here in the morning.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What made this night legendary was getting pulled over for looking suspicious while wearing an iron man mask
Uh do you have my pants because I have yours
New drinking game idea: Take a shot for every republican you see on facebook bitching about the ruling.
Good friends chat about sex - great friends ask about safe words.
so i showed up to the bars in a sombrero and a tie as a headband... so yeah, they didn't let me in
Everytime I give him head I make him rub my back. Teamwork at it's finest.
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