You know your in college when you decide house chores with games of beer pong...
I wonder what gingers are like in bed...as awkward as their hair or just as unique as it...?
You brought back some girl with you at 3am and introduced her to everyone as "hot pocket"
How was the bike ride?
Nope. High in the basement. Fruit cups.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i wrote down the address for planned parenthood on the back of the receipt for the condom that broke
i tried to climb in the window in the limo because i wanted the driver to take me to get noodles. ive reached a new level of fat kid
There are so many birds around me. And squirrels. I feel like that chick from Enchanted...but like if she had a dick and made poor life decisions.
My nipple piercings are like the guardrails, that's why they feel so safe.
I may or may not be wearing slippers and a TMNT hat. This thing better not have a dress code.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just want to meet whoever runs the hall cameras
hahahaha I don't. Watch one day i'll be walking along and someone will stop me and say "oh you're that one girl who is out. of. control." But then they'd probably give me a high five.
Best feeling in the world is getting a random boob pic from a drunk chick at 3 am.
My wife managed to convince me to not drink everclear by threatening to ban me from her vagina
why are there 3 differently sized panties on our kitchen counter?
I've never SEEN someone give negative fucks before. It's actually rather impressive. I want to study under them.
Just asphyxiate me and toss my corpse in the Ocean. It'll be easier than whatever the next four or eight years will bring.
Randomize