Stephanie. Problem. I think if I had met Murphy before Ben I would have fucked him instead.
Don't worry about your Murphy feelings. I may have fucked him no matter what.
I just was on a 20min team conference call where I didn't speak, I used a Gus Johnson soundboard online to answer questions asked to me...the highlight of 2010
he was already passed out before we got there, so i already knew i was going to like him
i am too hungover to go to class can you just call me and put it on speaker phone
It was good I woke up with my mattress on top of me. I walked around naked the whole night as people wished my Happy Birthday.
Please stop leaving drunk voicemails with your new black/Irish accent.
Apparently he's taking the slut he cheated on me with on a cruise for her birthday. THAT COULD HAVE BEEN ME. TITANTIC STYLE.
Wearing the 'Let's Party' thong feels weird without you...
HOLD ONTO YOUR PANTIES AND SAY GOODBYE TO THE REMAINDER OF YOUR INTEGRITY
I can smell the sangria seeping out of my pores
No,she came up with a new game: "Where is the most interesting place I can show Drew my asshole?"
Just for the record, I did not have sex in your bed. Happy 4th of July.
How is it that on the one day I'm just moving my car at 6:30 I get the walk of shame looks but when I come home at 9 am in a torn dress holding heels old ladies smile at me?
Well I've decided to refuse to conform to society and be naked the rest of the day.
I'm not saying you're stupid, just that you have bad luck when thinking...
Randomize