We named our party play list daddy issues
It was kinda bitchy last night when i brought up my pregnancy scare and you said "shotty playing with it"
sometimes i think i'm bisexual but then i realize the only girl i'm attracted to is myself.
His roomates just started party boying me. He stood there with the look of horror on his face.
Well if he truly loves me he will just have to accept my flaws. And that includes a tequila dependency and borderline lesbianism.
It probably isn't a good idea to go home with last night's hookup's brother. And sister.
Probably is probably an understatement.
The fact that when I blacked in you were sober enough to kick me out of your roommates bed makes me question our friendship.
Meghan got a job at the bar. We're now morally obligated to drink. Is this what dreams are made of?
I keep telling myself that if Britney can make it through 2007, I can make it through this date.
I told the cop to try walking in heels and he'd understand why I was walking home without then on. He told me he only does that on Wednesdays.
Fuck me first. Then we can craft and watch Terminator 2.
I feel like I should send her I'm sorry I've been fucking your boyfriend flowers.
i feel like doing his laundry was not included in the job description when we became fuck buddies.
Turns out, the guy I'm casually fucking has a girlfriend who's cheating on him with my sister's boyfriends brother who I fucked last year. And my sex life has now come full circle.
There were 16 girls and 31 titties. That’s how the club was. Lance doesn’t get to decide ever again.
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