Got a little crazy huh? Happy st pattys day. None of you have any idea where my credit card would be do you? How do i always lose
talk about how much treatments for your hpv hurts
Come in. Grab a controller and a beer. We've got some Madden to beat.
You're the best girlfriend ever.
Let me guess--your parents are cousins.
Better skin, bigger boobs.. Birth control is INCREASING my chance of getting pregnant because people actually want to have sex with me now.
she told me her two favorite things were grocery stores and dick.
If that really is brett favre's penis, no wonder she ignored his calls
I voted for him because his wife supports his raging sex life.
oh my god, there is an imprint from the nuva ring in the christmas card my mom sent me. merry christmas.
he tried to catch his projectile vomit...then went back to beer pong
Circumcision scars are like fingerprints. I think I'm on to something man.
Only I can have a panic attack in the back seat of a cop car and have them move me to the front seat.
i had an epiphany while laying on the driveway for 5 hours yesterday.
i realized i waste a lot of time
He fucked me while wearing his night time breathing machine mask. Does this mean I joined the dark side and he is Darth Vader?
She was riding me and giving me score updates to the basketball game at the same time..... Shes a keeper
Randomize
