People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
im pretty sure while i was fucking her my dog was fucking her dog too
this morning your mother said to me "sorry to have to meet you like this, in my sons bed" later she said "you never know whos gonna be in there. its scary sometimes"
I'm naked and wearing a cowbell.i love med school.
we didn't have anything to do and wanted to get our money's worth out of our costumes, so if you see two mermaids day drinking by the creek it's us
Literally lying on a futon being hand fed bacon
Fuck you.
These pissing matches have to stop. They led to last night's scotch through the nose shots. I'll never smell again.
I almost bumped into a man wrapped only in a blanket at 10 am
As I'm trying to leave her house she shushes me and puts my hand on her boob, then goes back to sleep. In like 30seconds. What the fuck.
Vaguely remember? You pushed George and two other fellas out the way to hug me, screamed gandalf before chugging your beer and smashing the bottle on the floor. I lolled.
Did I run away from you last night?
Yeah it was a great moment for our friendship
An hour is enough time for me to get drunk and win a dry hump marathon so I hope you have somewhat similar or better goals
I seriously had alll four of your knuckles bruised into my arm
I was giving this fat lawyer a table dance and he asked me if I would be willing to play with his long, hard stick of the law. And you want me to stop drinking at work?
He looks like Aladdin, and that's about all he's got going for him.
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