12 pack with dinner. Living by yourself is awesome.
Yeah, but thats the third time she's peed on me.
i know he has to tuck it when he gets excited in public and all, but now he is just starting to show off.
sometimes i look at this picture of your cock before i go to sleep, there's something comforting about it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I bought a zebra print bikini, I'm gonna be honest here- if he doesn't want to have sex with me in this, he's gay.
we have 69 mutual friends...i have to add her
Just bought an airhorn. Bad things will happen.
Tid bit for you to add to your "what to expecting when you're expecting to lose your virginity" book... Sex on nyquil is cheaper and BETTER than sex on esctacy AND you sleep like a champ after so you're not able to think about any bad decisions made.
All I've eaten today is cookie dough, pecan pie and three shots of jack. Finals week here I come.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know it's a good Halloween party when a guy wearing a light-up sombrero offers you blow.
I believe I can fly has to be one of the most inspirational songs of our time. Seriously R. Kelly nailed it
Then he went and peed on those teenagers.
My genitals don't want beer. They want to not feel like they wandered into a hornet's nest.
I can feel my teeth in 4 dimensions. I shouldnt be this high at 8 in the morning.
I wanna get a tattoo next to my tattoo that says, my ex did this so don't fucking ask
I'm still very high. To be blunt. No pun intended.
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