Does my surprise involve the use of a safe word?
Probably.
I'm in.
all i know is i woke up with a braid in my hair and i vaguely remember a cab driver telling me he would give me $10,000 to get him a green card. and he would take me to turkey. and give me free cab rides. im never drinking on my medicine again. lol.
I got "discovered a new religion high" last night
may or may not have recieved head in the car before we came in.
First straight guy ever blown in a Prius. Congrats.
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She said that I needed to "pregame her so it can slip right in."
he's like a stage 5 clinger and he won't even fuck me. he has to be gay. my personality isn't really THAT great.
Did Kevin really put his bar tab under the name Hercules last night?
dude to be honest with you there is a used condom that ive just left on my floor for three days
you have got to get your shit together
Cops just came and got two guys out of my class. I can't do college. Seriously cannot rage at this school anymore.
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he threw up in a solo cup, then washed it out and used it to play flip cup. Im not sure if thats resourceful or disgusting.
I hope you get your threesome on vday. I'll probably get flowers and a candlelit dinner. trade you. I wish this guy was more of a slut and had less of a heart. I would like 2 dicks please fuck your flowers!
Wanna go on a picnic?
... by picnic I mean wanna sit on a blanket and drink with me?
I had to explain to the doctor why I'm peeing blood. He still didn't believe a girl would have that much sex... You could feel the judgement forming in the room when I went into the details...
Damn, well a girls gotta get laid too
Some nights you do cocaine till 5:00 in the morning, and the next night you teach yourself how to crochet. It’s called balance.
So the vodka/tequila mix went down fine but the burp made me cry
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