i nerd-gasmd. plain and simple.
i don't plan on having that self control this summer
Maybe I'll tuck it in and pretend to be a woman pretending to be a man that is attracted to women that are attracted to women who look like men
Nothin says happy bday jesus like a shot with your loved ones.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Are you seriously gonna shit with that life vest on?
Are we responsible for the snowmen doing it doggy-style in my front yard?
Nah nah nah the rules are different on st patty day, drink beer or die. It's like the hunger games but blurrier
He said "you speak American pretty good for a Canadian" and it took everything in me to still fuck him. Dry spell ended btw
Life lesson 8263 if drinking a beer in the shower be careful when shampooing... Tresemme flavored rolling rock sucks
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Didn't pick classes because we were out all weekend...only open course is "alcohol and drug problems". Fucking ironic.
There has been a song made about you fucking his roommate.
It's destiny.
I'll be honest, I too would punch the 21 year old version of myself in the face, and then have rough sex with him.
He walked in on me masturbating and on my phone but got mad because I wasn't watching porn just tweeting
I still have that dildo-suction bruise on my forehead and this sweater STILL smells like my Christmas Eve vomit.
My mom is worried I'm not eating enough protein so she's sending me 48 cans of tuna. That's not a typo.
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