So I'm driving and this guy next to me at the stop light is reving his engine and honking at me. Motherfucker thinks that's because I'm asian and drive a honda I'm automatically going to race him
She asked me to facebook all the girls I'd hooked up with. She started crying when I started my search with A.
Wow, So this kid just walked into class, yak'd on his lab partner then runs out. Class is now cancelled. I gotta find this kid and Thank him.
do you ever get flashbacks of ppl you had sex with and just shudder at how gross they were/how drunk you were?
story of my life.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just spent 10 minutes talking to the lady who works at taco bell about my romantic situation.
does it count as a threesome if she tried to blow the dude who was passed out next to us?
But Monday we'll be living in a post-apocalyptic hellscape. Also, I'm going to a champagne tasting.
THERE IS A WINE CUBE IN MY ASS THIS IS NOT GOING AS PLANNED
he gave me a thermos so I could take my coffee with my on drive of shame. I was unexpectedly grateful...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Great news I took pics last night
Warning: most of them are of you peeing while I take selfies
Well. Your father was, shall we say, privately surfing the Internet when he found a video of you and Kevin. This was on a very public website honey.
By the way, Kevin! OMG good catch honey!
it's like his dick is making a u-turn.
girl pulled up to the stop sign, got out, threw up all over my hood said happy thanksgiving then drove off
sarahs drunk and is drawing dinosaurs all over the apartment. should i stop her?
whats she drawing them with?
eyeliner
no that's ok
I feel like I haven't slapped your ass in years. This will be awesome.
Randomize