i have a new swear word: supercalifuckaliciousexpialadamnit
I just heard a mom tell her toddler son "shut the fuck up. Don't ask me to buy you shit when i'm taking u to go see some fucking animals" welcome to the bronx.
I'm gonna put my relationship status as "widowed" to see if it helps me get some poon.
I'm not sure, but I think she had a tampon in when we fucked
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wish they had an "I'm Stoned" genre on online Netflix
votings over. no more wacking it to anti christine o'donnell ads
it's sunday funday. and also, who can outslut the other day.
youre not allowed to be friends with girls ive double teamed. period.
I let him fuck me in a batman costume. Don't talk to me about needing to read fifty shades gray.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
if i ever get hit by a car or something and become paralyzed promise me youll still be here to hand feed me shots and light my bowls please
It's like a booty call, except its for tacos...and you're my brother.
STOP WHATEVER YOU ARE DOING AND GO OUTSIDE RIGHT NOW. THE MOON LOOKS LIKE CATWOMAN
I hooked up with a blind guy last night... he's clapping in order to find his way around our apartment
You are the jesus of drinking
You ever stub your boner? It happened to me. Just know that drugs and strip poker and a hot tub. I'll Regale you with the story over drinks later.
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