I may or may not have just irish jigged at a bar. And broken out in a sweat from it. Not a good sign for that marathon yo.
i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
He was doing push ups, crunches and jogging in place in front of the restaurant. I'm not too sure I want to eat there if it requires immediate exercise following the meal.
so he reminded me it was our 9 month anniversary and then said "we could've had a baby by now"
On the airplane today the pilot actually said "Ladies and gentlemen I'm sorry for the delay. But I know all of you have problems, and so do we..."
i wish the dell website had a "did you drink an entire bottle of rum and stepped on your laptop which shattered the screen this weekend and would like to know how to fix it without your parents finding out FAST?" link on their homepage.. i can't be the only one
Someone just asked if you were the one who rode around the bar on some girls back
I just realized. my grades aren't ready for st patties day...
I definitely paid for a case and a fifth and all I got was 6 beers and a crown and coke. Wtf. Bar math sucks
All I vaguely remember from last night is getting up on that nice mahogany table and debating about squirrel's rights
I believe in using alcohol to heal from the inside. Not as a topical solution.
Nipple rings and loofahs DO NOT mix.
He puked in the middle of it and I still wasn't disappointed.
There needs to be a greeting card for "I miss having sex and smoking weed with you."
it was awkward when he was taking off my clothes and i had to help him undo my fanny pack
Randomize