just gave a homeless man a kiss in exchange for two handles
exact location. now.
I spent my night drunkenly staring at a picture of John Stamos. How do you think I feel?
Just saw two girls doing a walk of shame together. Slut bonding at it's best.
im not picky. i just want someone whod go down on me while im writing my psych midterm paper. thats not a lot to ask.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Aside from the fact that there's a penis in my mouth, that's a pretty good picture of me
He called my vagina a rainforest. This is coming from a guy whose pubes are longer than his dick.
My cat clawed my face because i tried to give it a foot massage...never doing shrooms again.
Embrace your curves. Cuz we're too poor for a coke habit.
I was wasted and the time changed. I blame the male strippers.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I had sex with a mask on because I have the flu and I didn't want to get him sick.
It's one am and you're asking me if you should buy a plane ticket for a booty call.
the bouncer just handed me a Starbucks bag of pound cake
How do I let my trainer know I'm only at the gym so I can get in more intense sex positions?
I just woke up and I don't really remember anything past 1pm. How much am I missing?
A good 10-11 hours. You got laid twice. Also, you out-ran a cop and played football with a lamp.
i need you to come over and tell me if you can notice that i'm only wearing a teddy underneath my trenchcoat
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