i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.
the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.
he actually proposed, and i threw up on him...i guess 5 glasses of wine was a bad idea.
I woke up this morning with a bag of pepperonis in my bed.... and my facebook status was "pepperonis"
Hiding in the clothes rack at walmart like a 4 year old. Already scared 3 people. New fav weekend activity
I'm full of awesome ideas
Yesss you are. Im full of confusion. I keep finding peanut butter on my legs...
So I put about 15 worms in the cuervo bottle. I don't think that's how it works but I feel like hallucinating by 11am
thanks for leaving the note with the doctor's recommendations for my lip, they are dissolvable stitches right?
I puked walking onto the plane. How do you think my post-Birthday hangover went?
This is the guy I made out with and it made me think of my dad. Let's never talk about it again.
I slept awesome next to you. You're like an electric blanket that I can have morning sex with.
I changed his contact info to "NO" and a picture of satan
Considering who their parents are, maybe you should use vodka for the baptism.
I'm 4,715,723% sure I don't give a fuck.
I'm sorry I couldn't bail you out, apparenty they dont take credit cards over the phone. Did you at least make any friends in jail?
By the time I realized I was watching a Danish porno with muppets it was already too late
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