Sadly no. But I was pantsless when they came to get me. Which made me miss you...
she's walking around the room telling people she can make the room move with her mind and then she shakes her head really fast yelling 'see?!'
Just saw two girls doing a walk of shame together. Slut bonding at it's best.
She jerked me off while she drove us back from Denver going 70mph. It was both the scariest and most erotic moment of my life.
Drunk off five beers on a Tuesday. I'm not sure which part of that statement is more sad
you asked the janitor if you could ride his floor cleaner.
I'm figuring, since someone shoved pizza crust in my ear last night, there might be some leftover pizza.
I dont know but I had two different hospital bands and half a pie when i woke up.
If I never see my landlord's dick again, it'll be too soon.
I know you're very busy with sleep and things, but when you wake up we need to talk about weirdly shaped penises.
i put frozen meatballs in my drink thinking they were ice cubes and I'm vegetarian wtf
He fingered me to the beat of the Fresh Prince theme song... it was pretty fantastic.
I managed to break 3 nails and loose my stockings, but I made 87 dollars at the strip club. I asked where I could find an application on the way out.
If you wanna fuck the pudding, fuck the pudding. Just not the chocolate, Im gonna eat that.
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