I told him to show me what he was made of and he came on my face. law students are so technical.
The more I look at him the more I wonder why anyone would ever want any of his features to be a part of their childs face.
my brother walked in while we were fucking, silently took my bong from my closet, saluted us and walked out.
I made my rape whistle into a roach clip device. FRESHMAN YEAR!
I don't think my arm is broken I can still text
Just blew a perc off the traytable on my flight, spring break has begun!!
I tried to explain to the cop how we all have skeletons in our closets but he just wouldn't listen.
also, add "teaching boys to sext" to my charity work
I peed my pants walking home last night... I just kept walking.
She leaned in close to me, made eye contact, and seriously whispered "I will eat your soul with bacon bits." I want whatever drug she was on.
i took a magical journey through the park for about two hours. it was amazing and everything was fantastical. i have been informed someone babysat me through that shit.
Never ever make a tattoo bet. I now have a shamrock on my dick.
I went home with him again and he LEFT HIS OWN HOUSE at 2 in the morning while I was IN THE BATHROOM.
Drink water, eat food, and stop tazing yourself
I have got to stop telling people I was almost a prositute every time I drink
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