I'm putting on too much make up bc I'm stoned
She rubs her butt on the bed & then she growls..
it appears as though my vagina has gotten the best of me again
is he apposed to sex in general? or just porch sex?
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Two girls I have never met just thumb wrestled to decide who gets to make out with me.
he ran me a hot bath. i thought i was in a pot and was going to be eaten. i was strangely ok with this
The gym has a pool
my gym membership just went from "way to get in shape" to "place to go swim when I'm high"
The used rubbers I threw behind her bed all semester must have landed on the baseboard heater. They went up in smoke when she turned on the heat last night.
We did it in the bathroom in Taco Bell. We didn't buy anything before we left, which I thought was rude.
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Your roommate from freshman year just had a baby. I think you're winning. Hooray for fifth year seniors!
If I don't get to have sex with him soon my entire female reproductive system is gonna climb out of my body and choke me to death
she has that "i will punish you like your mom did" vibe, i think guys like that.
She started snoring post sex, so I drunkenly walked 8 miles at 4am to go fishing. Please come pick me up
Listen, you eat the donut. I eat you out. Everybody wins.
No problem...what are friends for if they can't rub eachothers genitals.
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