considering i was high when my dad made me pee in the cup i might fail this one
Haha so I huess that means he's a little over 7. I can use my throat as a ruler!!
One less school supply you need to buy!!
i dont feel like going...you don't know how much work goes into getting my whore on
Even when you're not here I still manage to get pad thai in my vagina
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up with a pinecone in my hair. A full pine cone.
So I got hit in the face with a frying pan. So def wont be at work for first break if I'm there at all
Liz is crying about burritos again.
Is re-gifting a Valentine's Day present worse than re-gifting a Xmas one?
You're unbelievable, unbelievably awesome.
I'm so hungover that I just wrote up my will because I'm afraid I'm gonna die. I'm leaving you my bong.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well she made a 15 year old cry, the grandmother did an ice luge and I woke up to the sound of sex moans
Interesting. All i can really say is humanoid shaped doritos bags melting very slowly
The fact our science teacher from high school was buying us drinks and hitting on me doesn't matter.
he came over last night and we fucked with the great british baking show on in the background. it was beautiful
He has a bear rug in his room. I'm going to ask if we can have sex on it. Wilderness sex.
I am witnessing a blind guy whip ass at beer pong
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